Fat Burning Secrets - End the Embarrassment of not Loving Your Body
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February 28th, 2010 at 3:43 pm
***if you're easily offended then dont click here. seriously DONT***?
if you were a mother and your child killed herself and left this note, would you be offended? Is it too harsh and do you think it would be effective? Sorry if i offend you, buut hey i warned you..
ps:im not like this anymore, i wrote this last year and i’m just wondering how effective it would have been.
The fact that you’re reading this letter means that I am already dead.
So read my message to you, my message in a bottle… usually known as a long lost person sending a sacred message to someone. But I am that long lost person. Lost for many years. Longing for a way out. Then my bottle came to me, or rather your bottle. And all I had to do was take it out of the trash and set myself free.
This bottle represents so much more than just a message holder. It holds everything I hate the most. Just a few short hours ago it surrounded the very liquid that ruined my life, that now swims through your veins. The liquid that stole my mother from me. The devil in his worst form.
Take a good look at me, my cold body, the pain in my eyes. For it is the last time you will be with me, next to me, touching me. I am gone now. I feel no pain. Finally set free.
I wanted to be something, be someone. I wanted to make a difference in this world. I wanted to cure poverty, not to mention all of the other injustices that need fixing but no one will fix. It seems that everyone is so caught up in their own lives that they neglect to help those around them. Imagine what a great world we could live in.
But maybe I was never meant to be, born to die.
Right now you’re probably wondering why? Why would this girl so full of potential do this to herself? With her whole life ahead of her? Why would she give up so easily? Why? I cannot answer these questions for you, or any others you have on your mind. That is something you must do for yourself. Look deep inside yourself and see why this girl with so much potential would want to end it all. Try to understand things from my point of view. I know this idea is new to you, but just try for a few minutes. If it gets too hard, or the pain is too unbearable then you feel how I have felt for a long time. Imagine that you’re mother, the one person who’s supposed to be there for you has a terrible addiction. An addiction to a liquid so evil, so controlling, that it reduces her to nothing but a stumbling piece of embarrassment. Imagine knowing a secret, deep inside, that is the reason why your family was torn apart. Imagine being the only person who knows this secret and keeping it to yourself, even though it tears you apart, just to keep what little family you have left together. Imagine your father not loving you, leaving you without a reason, then trying to crawl his way back into your life, pretending that nothing has happened. And finally, imagine being a sixteen year old girl with all of this knowledge trapped inside your brain gnawing its way out. Pretending that all is well. Putting on a happy face day after day. Making jokes to cover up the pain, to hide your true self. Living a lie.
It’s too late now, what’s done is done. You can’t save me, but you can save your other children. Learn from your mistakes and move on. Don’t let this happen to another one of your children. They’re all you have left now. Cherish them. Give them what they need. Show them that you care for them and will do anything for them. Tell them that they mean the world to you. Tell them that you will never give up on them, even though you’ve given up on yourself.
Although you don’t know it, you’ve burnt everyone whose ever meant something to you. Your son, quiet and reserved, your daughter, ex suicidal, your ex husband, a heartless abandoner, David, confused and alone, and finally me, deceased. So finish what you started, cremate me and burn every last piece of me. Stab you’re cigarettes into me, throw me in a fire- I don’t care, just stop burning those who still have a chance. Stop hurting people who don’t deserve to be hurt. Stop hurting yourself.
I’d like to share with you my favorite piece of work. It’s a story I wrote for English. Nobody knew that the boy is me. Sitting in your very house was this paper for over a year. If you had just taken the time to read it perhaps it wouldn’t have become a reality. Perhaps the little boy would still be alive.
It is in the bottom draw of my desk in the blue file. Take the file to Miss Andrade, my English teacher and she will show it to you. Ask for the social injustice story. Explain to her what has happened and that I won’t make it to class anymore. I’m sick of living a lie. No more lies. Tell her the truth.
So now you feel my pain. The bottle that once held the very thing that ruined my life, now holds the very thing that ruined your life. Please learn from this, quit while you can. See this as a blessing. A second chance. I do not hate you. I do not blame you.
Do this for them.
And Sam, my dear Samuel. The only man I’ve ever loved
February 28th, 2010 at 8:45 pm
I’m sixteen years old and I have tried to kill myself over four times.
I would never leave that kind of note for my parent. My mom died when I was six years old and he has been through so much.
In the letter I wrote him, and my ex-fiancee just told them that I did this due to the fact that I wasen’t happy. I basically just told them that I loved them but I wasen’t ment to be alive.
That would be harsh for your mother to read…especially since she just found you dead!
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February 28th, 2010 at 8:47 pm
You need to destroy this letter. Its in the past now. It cannot be healthy for you to hang on to it. Unless you are trying to vent hatred for mother. Maybe you dont want to die but you want her to feel guilt. I have felt like this myself. I fantasized about suicide notes left to parents.
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February 28th, 2010 at 8:49 pm
CA REEP EE!!
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February 28th, 2010 at 8:51 pm
the only thing thats missing is a violin lol
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if ya gonna do it ya do it..only selfish ones do it…
February 28th, 2010 at 8:53 pm
Well, it’s extremely bitter, for certain, but it seems justified to me. I know alcoholics have problems and deserve pity, but their children are still totally right to be furious… Have you told her any of this, directly, calmly, though? If I were a parent I *would* be offended if this were the first time I was told all this so bluntly. Killing yourself (or even just planning it) and leaving a bitter note is such an extreme blow, it would only be deserved if you had tried already to communicate honestly and were brushed off.
How old are you? Because you sound older, like you’re independent… If this is the case, and you haven’t told her this so bluntly before, I think you should write her a letter. It’s not as traumatic as a bitter suicide note, but she shouldn’t be so able to blow it off or ignore you if it isn’t in person. And if you haven’t told her any of this, you have to! It doesn’t matter if this is old and you’re not suicidal anymore, the feelings are still there and have to be addressed…
Good luck
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February 28th, 2010 at 8:55 pm
RIP
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February 28th, 2010 at 8:57 pm
Rest in Peace.. i hope you have a happy and better life in your next life..
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